#Redbox52: The problem with feelings

Ahhh! Happy Monday! I hope that everyone's week is going well. Normally, Monday is my day off, but now that we have a couple people that have moved on to new television stations (one to Fort Myers, the other to Orlando - gonna miss 'em so much!) things have gotten a bit shaken up. Not to worry though, I'm working better than ever and happier in the past few weeks than I've been in a long time.

So, onto this week's #Redbox52, Killing The Softly:

First thoughts: good movie - a taaaad bit violent, but since I don't mind violence, it's alright by me. I can definitely say the best thing about this movie is the intentional use of news footage from the financial crisis of 2008 - it was literally brilliant. 

Or maybe I'm so used to movies just doing their own thing that when I see something done well, it just blows me away.

Anyway, it was a lot of fun to watch. The clips that were used were always placed against a scene that directly related to what was being said, I love that.

There was a lot of interesting dialogue in the movie and for some people that was a setback, but there were a few interactions that really got me going, one in particular was between Driver (Richard Jenkins) who works with the mafia as a middle man of sorts and Jackie Cogan (Brad Pitt) who is a hitman.

They're discussing a hit that needs to be made and Cogan goes into why he doesn't want to hit a particular target and gives a better understanding of the title of the movie.

"I like to kill them softly, from a distance, not close enough for feelings. Don't like feelings. Don't want to think about them."

It caught me off guard a bit once I understood what killing someone "softly" actually meant. After thinking it over, it brought to mind various interactions I had in the past with people on social networks, from Tumblr to Twitter, one of the great things was that you're able to make a connection with people, getting a glimpse into whatever parts of their life they're willing to expose.

The downside, of course, is that depending on what you put out there, you also are opening yourself up to a lot of criticism. In fact, I would go off on a limb and say that most interactions online whether it's commentary on a show or on an event happening in someone's life, what a celebrity is wearing or something happening in the news, since we don't directly know the people we can say whatever we want to, often without feeling any sort of remorse.

As someone who works in the news industry, one of my biggest fears is that one day, I will stop being able to relate to people, that I will eventually get desensitized to it all. Just yesterday I did a story about a 7-year-old who was mauled by 2 pitbull mix breeds that died and another story on a 90-year-old man who was murdered. A former coworker of mine once told me that one of the things that haunts him is the fact that when he would drive around town, the first thing he would remember is the stories he had done.

I drove around town a few weeks ago and realized, I was the same way. On one corner, a homeless person was found dead, on another, a manhunt for a robber that had guns and was taken down by dogs. It breaks my heart a little bit to think about how in just a matter of 1 year, I covered 3 or 4 stories about teenagers dying behind the wheel, far too many memorial services for young people who hadn't even gotten a chance to get to college, to live their lives to what we considered a full extent.

It hurts. On one hand, as a reporter, I don't want to relate, I don't want to have feelings about my stories because God knows they would haunt me...but on the other, to not have some sort of feeling about it all would make me less than a human. I don't know how reporters in the field, covering wars, genocide, sex slavery - it's one thing to do a long form documentary on it, but in news, it's often that you cover something for a day or two and then it's on to the next thing, no follow up, no seeing how things go later in life. It's a hard balance because if we stayed on one thing too long, the sad truth, is that most people wouldn't care...and I think that's probably what hurts the most.

#Redbox 52: Marry for love?

There are few things that are good about being sick...but if I had to pick one, it is being forced (for the most part) to stay home and stay warm and do what you like. For me, that has included, eating healthy, reading books, taking baths, and watching movies.

Today's Redbox 52 takes a strong look at love and marriage and fidelity and forgiveness.

Anna Karenina looks at several different types of love, dutiful love, forbidden love, maternal love, enduring love, and, of course, romantic love. Sadly, only two of these loves comes out a true winner in the end, and that's romantic love combined with enduring love, but boy oh boy, watching it all play out before your eyes sure is beautiful.

If there was one thing this movie made me think about, it was the reasons we choose to get married.

When I was younger, a family member told me marrying for love was foolish because love can fade when certain things change and that the smart thing to do was to marry someone you could work with. As unromantic as that sounds, I understand what they meant. Too often we see people rushing to jump the broom because they're severely infatuated with someone, they don't necessarily know them and they have a bunch of qualities that aren't that great, but they're in "love" so they get married.

While I see marriages that start like that usually end in unhappiness, I still believe in marrying for love as long as the love is also matched with common goals and the desire to make the relationship work.

In Anna Karenina we see several couples, many have married as a way to move up in their social status or simply to maintain it. For most, the marriages are loveless aside from their children. You see affairs as characters go in and out to try and fill a void they had hoped to have managed through their union. With Anna's character, she is content in her marriage, though she knows she did not marry for love, however her husband is noble and kind, with a good head on his shoulders and a career that can sustain the both of them, for most, the ideal man to marry.

However, she soon finds herself caught in a different type of situation, a love that starts with an obsession and then grows to an addiction, and as most addictions go, it ends badly. In the movie, the topic of infidelity comes up several times, but my favorite quote is from a man who believes desperately in true, virtuous love.

"An impure love is not love to me. To admire another man's wife is a pleasant thing, but sensual desires indulged for its own sake is greed, a kind of gluttony, and a misuse of something sacred, which is given to us so that we may choose the one person with whom to fulfill our humanness."

As I said, I believe in marrying for love. I'm a staunch believer in romantic love, true love; I believe it comes with time and with work, but that two people, committed to growing together can make it work. That is why romantic + enduring love will always come out a winner, whether in fiction or in our day to day lives...call me crazy but I believe it.

If you've watched the movie, or read the book - which I plan to do - tell me what you think! And when it comes to love, what are the things that you believe make it work? Would you marry for love or are other factors more important?

#Redbox52: One for all

It took me a week - a full week - to watch this week's movie, which is why the review is coming on a Thursday versus Monday. So...this week's movie:

I can't really explain why this movie took so long for me to watch, it wasn't just that it clocked in at almost 3 hours, it wasn't that it was a boring or a dry movie, and it's not that the topic matter wasn't compelling, but it was painful to watch.

Coming from a military family, the events of September 11th and the aftermath hurt. No other way to put it. My father is currently a Lt. Col. in the Army and now works in one of the big buildings and if something like this were to happen again...I don't think I would ever want to think about something like that.

I remember when this movie first was advertised being incredibly pissed off that someone would make a movie about it in the first place. I was frustrated, disgusted, aggravated that they would take something like this and make it into entertainment: but the truth of the matter is that's just what Hollywood does. They take things, often times things we don't necessarily wish to bring up in everyday conversation and make it a topic again.

The first hour or so, or at least the first bit I watched, made me not want to watch the entire thing. Seeing torture is not something that I enjoy, but as I continued to sit through all the pieces of the movie, bit by bit, I began to enjoy it more.

The characters, watching them go through the motions of dealing with what was happening, the obvious stress of not knowing whether or not you were going to accomplish your mission, the constant doubts, the constant setbacks, all leading up to one triumphant moment, the story we all thought we knew so well.

Overall, I enjoyed the movie. It felt good to watch it, felt incredible to have a woman be the person that figured it out, that had the heart to go with her gut at all times, to follow something with a steadfast endurance that the movie couldn't even fully capture if we were to be honest.

I mean - tell me - when was the last time you dedicated every aspect of your life for nearly a decade to one thing and one thing only? I can't think of anything that I've even dedicated to fully for a year

All that being said, watching this movie wasn't easy...watching this movie hurt, because in the process, I found myself seeing things from an interesting perspective.

There's a scene where the main character, Maya, is attacked. A couple of guys try to shoot up her car, kill her, and they're unsuccessful. It made me think about how things are framed because to us, she's a hero, but to them she's a threat to their life - a terrorist. I always stop and wonder how we as a country are perceived by outsiders. Are we these terrible people that constantly invade in places we don't belong? Are we people with good intentions? Or are we simply the enemy?

I let the thoughts go and continued on with my day, and eventually the movie, but now I can't help but think about this in personal terms: how we always see ourselves as the hero but never as the antagonist.

Anyway, if you haven't seen the movie, I suggest you do. It's interesting, insightful, and opens your eyes to not just what happened that day, but how much was lost and learned along the way.

#Redbox 52: Power of friendship

I'm so happy that I made the choice to do this whole, movie thing, because I'm getting to see movies I never would have seen otherwise. For example, this week's movie:

The Intouchables is a French comedy-drama that became the second biggest box office hit in France and voted the cultural event of 2011 - to put it simply, it was quite a big deal...and to think I almost passed it over to pick The Sessions, d'ah well, thank you dear CVS employees for casually helping me make this decision: it was a good one.

It isn't hard to find stories that embody friendship, but this bond is one that is rather peculiar. For some critics, the movie bears an extreme resemblance to Driving Miss Daisy and while I can understand the comparisons, I think it's a bit deeper than that.

 The story begins at present day but then jumps to a flashback to explain how the two characters, Phillipe and Driss, ended up together. As the story progresses you get to see how the two become friends with quick wit, constantly jabbing at one another, and growing together. Driss develops a better understanding of art, picks ups painting, and Phillipe learns how to truly appreciate music, the feelings it can bring forth. However, as great as it is to see the characters open up and grow, my favorite parts of the movie are the simple acts of tenderness that push it forward.

#Redbox52: Feel like a hero

I've decided to call this movie thing I'm doing the Redbox 52 since every movie I'm reviewing will be a new release from the Redbox. So, what was today's movie...

Normally when I think of police movies or a lot of different action movies, I assume that the plot will be lackluster, the acting will be meh and I'm really in it for the bangs. 

This movie was not that.

I was floored by the movie because it was really, really good. I enjoyed the dialogue between characters, the relationships that you saw grow, and found myself getting almost teary eyed as I finished it up.

What made this movie great was that it didn't focus on all the different relationships in the movie, it focused primarily on the partnership between police officers Brian Taylor and Miguel Zavala. We see these two characters go through plenty together and watch their bond as brothers on the force grow. 

That in and of itself was probably the most surprising thing about this film. When I put the movie in, I wasn't expecting to be blown away, I was expecting to see a cop movie where the good guys win, the bad guys go down, car chases, gun fights, the whole 9 yards, and to an extent I got that, but on top of that I got a story of two men going through it.

There are plenty of laughs and the ability to watch the characters grow in their personal relationships as they go through different stages in their life.

Behind my badge is a heart like yours. I bleed, I think, I love, and yes I can be killed. And although I am but one man, I have thousands of brothers and sisters who are the same as me.

The movie starts with a monologue from Brian Taylor and it tugged at my heart strings. Working in news has caused me to meet a lot of police officers which ultimately means that I associate each of the characters with real people. So of course, I had to call them up to see how they felt about the movie and admit that yes I did cry when blahblahblahnotgoingtoruinitblahblahblah happened or I laughed extra hard when soandso said suchandsuchathing...but more importantly, it made me appreciate what they do  and the sacrifices they make every day.

Anyway, the movie is good, especially as someone who doesn't believe in this whole screw the police mentality, it lets you see things from their perspective...I definitely would recommend it to any and everyone. 

Weigh your options

I love movies. I love watching them, reading about them, reading the books their based on, I just love everything involved in the creative process of making a movie. So, I'm starting something that will let me do both things that I love: movies and writing. Every week, a new movie...so we're starting...today!

Movie 1: Celeste and Jesse Forever

I have no problem admitting that I kinda sorta adore romantic comedies, but I think the best thing that's happened to romance movies recently is their decision to try and be more realistic.

We grew up in an era where movies were made to showcase this unbelievable love. I mean, I love The Notebook as much as any normal woman does and A Walk to Remember - I'm shaking my head with my eyes closed just thinking about how romantic everything was, even Titanic had the epic love that endured. When you look at most love related stories, there's a tendency for things to just...be so blissful and the only thing that ever separates them is death.

What a drag that in our society, that just doesn't seem to be the case anymore.

...and it looks like quite a few movies are catching on. The idea that art is a direct reflection of society at the time is showing pretty hardcore. The thing I loved about Celeste and Jesse Forever is that it never claimed or tried to be some awesome love story. It was actually a story that told what happens when life happens - to a degree at least.

You have two people that were in love, deeply in love, and that just didn't work out, but they have this great amazing friendship that everyone thinks is kinda weird (totally been in their shoes before, I mean we weren't in love or married but...you get the point...sorta) and it's endearing.

I don't want to spoil the movie, but I think what I enjoyed most about it was how it didn't try to speed things up. It let you see things as they happened and it was a movie that was easy to relate to.

I think if there was one moment in the movie that kinda stuck with me it was when Celeste is out and has this interaction with a friend:

Celeste: "He's just going about everything so wrong."
Paul: "You want to be right or you want to be happy?"

It hit home...this battle with always wanting to be right and the sacrifice we make sometimes in our efforts to be right thereby throwing our happiness to the wind when we're faced with a disagreement.